airagorn:

dumb story because i think i’m funny

we were watching a movie in school and there was a scene where this guy was driving over lava and they kept showing close up shots of the tires catching on fire and i started laughing and my friend kept asking me what was so funny and when i finally composed myself i took a deep breathe and whispered

‘hot wheels’

sabrinagrimm:

sabrinagrimm:

WHEN I WAS 4 I WAS ON SESAME STREET AND I HAD AN INTERVIEW WITH GROVER AND HE ASKED ME HOW IT FELT WHEN I FALL OFF MY BIKE AND I CHUCKLED DARKLY AND SAID “I DON’T FALL OFF MY BIKE” AND HE LOOKED AT THE CAMERA AND SAID “oh.” NAD THEN I SATRTED POINTING AND LAUGHIGN AT HIM AND THEN THEY CUT TO THE NEXT SCENE AND THAT WAS IT THAT IS MY LEGACY

my-name-is-hilarious:

theyahoostaff:

yourfriendthecrow:

I don’t know bout y’all, but the Yahoo staff are fucking HILARIOUS

We are not fucking HILARIOUS

HILARIOUS COME HERE AND TELL THEM THAT WE ARE NOT FUCKING

theyahoostaff and i are just friends gOD

zfitzgerald:

I’m a nerd, but not in the useful “you’ll all be working for me one day when I invent jet packs” way. I’m a nerd in the “I have very strong opinions about history and literature and will yell them at you if you give me even the slightest opportunity” way. And that one does not pay well.

nerdfighter13812:

ohanameansfandom:

Whenever anyone argues against marriage equality because of their religious views as a Christian I just want to hit them over the head repeatedly with a Bible whilst yelling

ADULTERY ISN’T ILLEGAL!!

LYING ISN’T ILLEGAL!!

DIVORCE ISN’T ILLEGAL!!

DISRESPECTING YOUR PARENTS ISN’T ILLEGAL!!

WORKING ON THE SABBATH ISN’T ILLEGAL!!

WORSHIPPING OTHER GODS ISN’T ILLEGAL!!

THE LAW DOES NOT FOLLOW THE BIBLE!!!!!

I’m a Christian and I approve this message.